Tuesday, 13 October 2015

Advice to Ghanaian men when being set up

Okay, so this post isn’t just for Ghanaian men it can apply to any and all males. It’s just that I’m in Ghana dealing with Ghanaian men right now. 

It’s the strangest phenomenon actually. When you meet a guy on your own these things don’t tend to happen, but as soon as they know they’re being introduced to you as a “potential love match” the guys get all weird.

I’d like to help my brothers out a little so here we go with my list of ways they should (and shouldn’t behave) when they’ve been set up.

1. Remember it is NOT an arranged marriage. It’s just an introduction.

2. Do not call her any term of endearment within the first few weeks of speaking to her on the phone, especially not the first day. You don’t even know her so show her respect by calling her by name.

3. Ask her questions to get to know her and tell her about yourself. This should be a obvious but…

4. Do not presume that because she’s single and was introduced to you that she’s desperate. You will eventually be embarrassed at your erroneous presumption.

5. Even if you’re desperate to get married due to family pressure or whatever, tame it down. Nothing turns a woman on more than hearing that you’ll marry anyone who comes along.

6. Unless you chat like long lost friends when you first communicate, do not barrage her with phone calls, texts, Whatsapp messages, etc. This borders on stalking.

7. Do not. I repeat Do not tell her you love especially after the first conversation. Especially before you’ve had a chance to actually meet. It makes you seem desperate (see point number 5).

8. Stay humble. I tried to keep this one on the positive, but do not brag sounds better.

9. Be yourself. We’d prefer to get to know the real you from the onset rather than be surprised later.

10. Be kind, but have a backbone. Don’t agree with everything we say to try to get on our good side, it will bite you in the ass later.

My brothers, I hope I’ve provided you with a little assistance. My sisters, I accept all the cyber space high fives.


  1. So many great points! I've never been in a situation where I was set up, but #7 has happened to me before. He even tried to make me say it back. It...was really creepy, needless to say!

    1. Lol, Heather. I take it that relationship didn't go far at all.

  2. Good one, Nana. Point #7 is mui importante. And the sarcasm of point #5 may be lost on these my Ghanaian brothers oh

    1. Lol. You are so right about the sarcasm, but I had to keep it in because I hoped maybe one of them would get it. Just one, mind you.

  3. This was great! Still laughing at #7 . . . And it's sound advice for all men everywhere, really.

    ***Cyber high five***


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